Uh Oh...Payge stole Parker's paci
Oh No....Parker broke another glass dish
NO NO Parker do not bite your DeDe!
Too often I find myself saying one of these phrases, and the list goes on and on!
Uh Oh....we are on our last diaper
Oh No....Parker took his diaper off during nap time
NO NO Payge please do not push your brother!!!
Life with two 14 month olds is often at times humerous, and other times nerve racking, but luckily we can laugh through the broken dishes. So far, Parker has broken a hurrican candle holder in Mom's entry way and a pyrex glass at my Aunt's kitchen. Payge usually screams anytime someone puts on their shoes and she doesn't have her's on, Parker's new favorite thing to do is take off his diaper (especially during nap time), and today at lunch, he even slung his mashed potatoes on a waitress walking by!
Uh Oh...Payge pee'd on Pop on the airplane
Oh No...we are sitting to "Susie Sunshine" who seems to hate children
NO NO....Parker you can not run through the airport on your own!!
It has been trying, and even hard at times...but thankfully I am blessed with an amazing support system. We have a Dede who is the best helping hand around, a Pop who is good for laughs and outside play, an uncle who will sacrafice his day off to go to a "splash pad".....
My kiddos may not have the "boutique" baby items, they may wear Target clothes and shoes and sometimes, towards the end of the pay period...we even wear the off brand diapers....but P2 is loved. They are loved by family, friends, the wait staff at Hugos and elderly couples eating breakfast at McDonalds. We have our FAIR share of "Uh Ohs, Oh No's and NO NO's" but we also have our fair share of fun, laughs and memories.
Uh Oh...Parker just found the TV remote
Oh No....Payge saw me put on my sneakers
NO NO....DO NOT THROW YOUR FOOD AT EACH OTHER!!
Ahh the joys of Motherhood!
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Friday, June 1, 2012
The Way...
"Jesus told him, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me." John 14:6
Too often we forget to allow others, or even God, to show us the way, when it comes to many aspects in life. Too often we fail to reach out to others during our struggles, and too often we forget that we have to learn "the way" that works best for us.
Parenthood is a matter that has many "ways."
Breastfeed vs Bottles
Clother diapers vs Disposable
Stroller vs carry sling
Pacifer vs no pacifier
Crib sleeper vs co sleeping
The list goes on and on....
No wonder being a "first timer" is often so hard.
Chris and I are lucky though, actually we are blessed. We got a test drive at parenthood before we had the twins. We had someone show us "the way."
It started with a phone call and a quick meeting at McDonalds, and it ended with broken hearts, tearful eyes and a cry out for help. It was a "trial run" at parenthood, and I truly believed we passed. For 7 weeks we learned how to take slower steps, love more tenderly, treasure each moment. Not only did this precious 14 month old show us the way, he opened up our hearts, taught us lesssons and gave us memories for the years to come. Thank you sweet "Thunder" for showing Dada and I the way, for teaching us to soak up each and every minute we have, and for making our hearts bigger.
As the babies turn 14 mos today, (the same age as our "Thunder" when we got him), I can't help but to remember the things he enjoyed, what made him laugh or his favorite meals....and even though I want to fight back tears, I remember that just like Jesus, "Thunder" showed us the way. He showed us that we could do it...we could put our selfishness aside and become "parents" one day.
So, at 14 mos, as the babies drink from their QT cups, splash in the tub at bathtime with their Daddy and break out in dance at any given moment, my heart fills up with joy and I know that we were shown the way to love, forgive, cherish and smile by a little boy who came and went way to quickly.
Happy 14 months sweet babies! Mommy loves you P2!
Too often we forget to allow others, or even God, to show us the way, when it comes to many aspects in life. Too often we fail to reach out to others during our struggles, and too often we forget that we have to learn "the way" that works best for us.
Parenthood is a matter that has many "ways."
Breastfeed vs Bottles
Clother diapers vs Disposable
Stroller vs carry sling
Pacifer vs no pacifier
Crib sleeper vs co sleeping
The list goes on and on....
No wonder being a "first timer" is often so hard.
Chris and I are lucky though, actually we are blessed. We got a test drive at parenthood before we had the twins. We had someone show us "the way."
It started with a phone call and a quick meeting at McDonalds, and it ended with broken hearts, tearful eyes and a cry out for help. It was a "trial run" at parenthood, and I truly believed we passed. For 7 weeks we learned how to take slower steps, love more tenderly, treasure each moment. Not only did this precious 14 month old show us the way, he opened up our hearts, taught us lesssons and gave us memories for the years to come. Thank you sweet "Thunder" for showing Dada and I the way, for teaching us to soak up each and every minute we have, and for making our hearts bigger.
As the babies turn 14 mos today, (the same age as our "Thunder" when we got him), I can't help but to remember the things he enjoyed, what made him laugh or his favorite meals....and even though I want to fight back tears, I remember that just like Jesus, "Thunder" showed us the way. He showed us that we could do it...we could put our selfishness aside and become "parents" one day.
So, at 14 mos, as the babies drink from their QT cups, splash in the tub at bathtime with their Daddy and break out in dance at any given moment, my heart fills up with joy and I know that we were shown the way to love, forgive, cherish and smile by a little boy who came and went way to quickly.
Happy 14 months sweet babies! Mommy loves you P2!
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Everything YOU Do
Almost every day, Mom, P2 and I have a routine of walking or biking at Claremore Lake. Sometimes the "boys" join us, and fish while we stroll along. After a very stressful day at work a few weeks back, I told mom that I felt like "I had the short end of the stick" because Chris was getting "him time" and getting to fish without the babies. I hit a chord with mom and she reminded me that I had prayed, wished and hoped for these babies...and boy was she right.
Too many times, I get stressed or overwhelmed, but as I was rushing around getting ready for Church this morning, a song came across my Pandora list by Steven Curtis Chapman called "Do Everything."
"Your picking up toys on the living room floor for the 15th time today,
Matching up socks,
Sweeping up lost cheerios that got away.
You put a baby on your hip,
Color on your lips, and head out the door...
While I may not know you,
I bet I know you
Wonder sometimes, does it matter at all??
Well let me remind you, it all matters just as long
as you do everything you do to the glory of the One who made you...."
Wow. Shut the door.
As we often do, Mom and I got into an indepth conversation about life, parenthood, the future, the past, our journey, etc... yesterday morning, and she said "I prayed for you to be a mom, because I know how badly you wanted to be one. I was scared that you would never get that opportunity."
Isn't it funny how MOM's always know the things to say or do that pull you out of your slump??
I had been sulking because Chris was away on a "man trip" fishing and after mom spoke those words to me, I remember that I had prayed, for years, for God to allow me to be a mom. God blessed me. He made me a Mom of Multiples and sometimes I forget to Thank Him.
So now, as I sweep the floor after breakfast, lunch, snack and dinner, and fold the 3rd load of laundry for the day, I will replay the words of Steven Curtis Chapman and TRY (we are only human :)) to do everything with a smile on my face.....because in the end, it does matter :)
Too many times, I get stressed or overwhelmed, but as I was rushing around getting ready for Church this morning, a song came across my Pandora list by Steven Curtis Chapman called "Do Everything."
"Your picking up toys on the living room floor for the 15th time today,
Matching up socks,
Sweeping up lost cheerios that got away.
You put a baby on your hip,
Color on your lips, and head out the door...
While I may not know you,
I bet I know you
Wonder sometimes, does it matter at all??
Well let me remind you, it all matters just as long
as you do everything you do to the glory of the One who made you...."
Wow. Shut the door.
As we often do, Mom and I got into an indepth conversation about life, parenthood, the future, the past, our journey, etc... yesterday morning, and she said "I prayed for you to be a mom, because I know how badly you wanted to be one. I was scared that you would never get that opportunity."
Isn't it funny how MOM's always know the things to say or do that pull you out of your slump??
I had been sulking because Chris was away on a "man trip" fishing and after mom spoke those words to me, I remember that I had prayed, for years, for God to allow me to be a mom. God blessed me. He made me a Mom of Multiples and sometimes I forget to Thank Him.
So now, as I sweep the floor after breakfast, lunch, snack and dinner, and fold the 3rd load of laundry for the day, I will replay the words of Steven Curtis Chapman and TRY (we are only human :)) to do everything with a smile on my face.....because in the end, it does matter :)
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Mother's Day
There is a sign hanging in my parent's living room that reads, " My greatest blessings call me Mom." For the first 25+ years of my life, there is no way that the sign made sense or even crossed my mind, but after the first year...it speaks straight to my heart. Too often, in the midst of sleepless nights, dirty diapers and interupted meals, we forget that God blessed us, and made us MOMS.
Unfortunately, I know for a fact that I wasn't always a blessing to my mom, and I pray that God does not make me pay for my raising with Payge, because I'm not quite sure I could handle it or forgive as easily as my own precious mother did. But even though I was an unruly, rude and obnoxious teenager, my mom still loved, still guided, and still prayed for me. Now, as we enjoy our walks at the lake and QT Sweet lemon teas, I can't imagine what life would be like if she hadn't forgiven me, hadn't loved me and hadn't had faith that one day, I would be her sweet "blessing" again.
After reading a recent book by Karen Kingsbury, it hit me that too often we over look the simple pleasures, blessings, in life, and find a way to focus in on the bad. Life is not peaches and apple pie, sometimes it is sour grapes and spilled milk...but in every long, tireless night, stressful days and endless doctors appointments, to each is own a blessing.
Monday we visited OU Children's in OKC to do a check up with Parker's prosetic dr and his Ortho surgeon...(these trips are tiring, stressful and very demanding) after a quick snack in the lobby, we headed to appointment number 1, and of course the dr was running late....as we sat in the waiting room, a man missing a limb came in and keep a constant eye on my two, healthy babies, running around the waiting room. Appointment went great. Blessing. We made our way upstairs for appointment number 2, where we learned the Dr was running 30-45 minutes behind. Disastorious with 2 unruly "toddlers" contained to a packed waiting room. We were carrying around Parker's DOBBS braces when another mother asked if he had club foot. My mom visited with her and learned that her son had been diagnosed in the womb with Club Foot, and had just completed one of his several surgeries. Her son removed his shoes and showed us his scars, and his feet. He was 9. Humbled.
Blessings flow from above.And even though my babies prefer their Uncle DJ and Pop over me 82% of the time...they are my greatest blessings. I know the road ahead will be a curvy, bumpy one....but as I smile thru the tears, I know that God will help me survive, just like he helped my mom survive those 10 "wild" years of mine.
" My greatest blessings call me MOM"
Unfortunately, I know for a fact that I wasn't always a blessing to my mom, and I pray that God does not make me pay for my raising with Payge, because I'm not quite sure I could handle it or forgive as easily as my own precious mother did. But even though I was an unruly, rude and obnoxious teenager, my mom still loved, still guided, and still prayed for me. Now, as we enjoy our walks at the lake and QT Sweet lemon teas, I can't imagine what life would be like if she hadn't forgiven me, hadn't loved me and hadn't had faith that one day, I would be her sweet "blessing" again.
After reading a recent book by Karen Kingsbury, it hit me that too often we over look the simple pleasures, blessings, in life, and find a way to focus in on the bad. Life is not peaches and apple pie, sometimes it is sour grapes and spilled milk...but in every long, tireless night, stressful days and endless doctors appointments, to each is own a blessing.
Monday we visited OU Children's in OKC to do a check up with Parker's prosetic dr and his Ortho surgeon...(these trips are tiring, stressful and very demanding) after a quick snack in the lobby, we headed to appointment number 1, and of course the dr was running late....as we sat in the waiting room, a man missing a limb came in and keep a constant eye on my two, healthy babies, running around the waiting room. Appointment went great. Blessing. We made our way upstairs for appointment number 2, where we learned the Dr was running 30-45 minutes behind. Disastorious with 2 unruly "toddlers" contained to a packed waiting room. We were carrying around Parker's DOBBS braces when another mother asked if he had club foot. My mom visited with her and learned that her son had been diagnosed in the womb with Club Foot, and had just completed one of his several surgeries. Her son removed his shoes and showed us his scars, and his feet. He was 9. Humbled.
Blessings flow from above.And even though my babies prefer their Uncle DJ and Pop over me 82% of the time...they are my greatest blessings. I know the road ahead will be a curvy, bumpy one....but as I smile thru the tears, I know that God will help me survive, just like he helped my mom survive those 10 "wild" years of mine.
" My greatest blessings call me MOM"
Sunday, April 1, 2012
1 year....
1 year...
12 months....
52 weeks....
365 days...
8765.8 hours....
525948.7 minutes....
31556926 seconds.....
What a whirlwind of a year it has been. It started on March 27, 2011 with me having someone drive me to the Dr. thinking I had the flu....5 days later, my sweet babies entered this world, 7 weeks early, at 4:23 and 4:24 pm weighing 4.14lbs and 4.1lbs.
The seconds that happened afterwards are a foggy blur to me...I do recall that one of the Dr.'s in the room was Dr. Butcher and I immediately asked for his first name....I remember Chris mentioning Parkers feet to me, but I didn't fully understand. I remember the Dr saying that it was 2 boys at first and I said, "What?!? It's supposed to be one of each!" and he laughed and said Baby B (Payge) was a little girl.
What I recall and what Chris recalls are completely different. I don't remember much after the babies were born, and Chris on the other hand got to cut their chords. Parkers cutting was rushed since he quit breathing on his own and had to be inubated.
Minutes later I remember meeting the Neonatilist (Dr. Miranda) who said that they were going to have to take the babies to NICU and I pushed Chris away and told him to go with them since I couldn't......
A few hours later I recall the nurse asking if I wanted visitors and I said that I didn't, but my mom and Miranda snuck back anyways....lol. I can still remember the shirt that Miranda had on and that she told everyone in the waiting room she was going to the bathroom. Man, I love my TT.
Almost a full day later, I got to see my sweet babies for the very first time. Since I had been on Oxygen due to a very low pulse/ox and had problems keeping my blood pressure down, I had not been able to see them yet. As Chris pushed me down the hall, I became full of so many emotions...joy, anxiety, nervousness and anticipation...I was about to meet my sweet babies for the very first time.
4 days later, my mom and I pulled away from the Hospital empty handed. There were no car seats or babies going home with me, and I struggled trying to realize it wasn't my fault. I cried, screamed and asked why all the way to my brother and sister in laws house where I would stay, since it was closer to the hospital. That night, I curled up and cried myself to sleep.
5 weeks later, my sweet Peanut decided to pull out her feeding tube and nipple all of her feeds, as well as pass her carseat test and sleep study test. She was ready to go home.
2 months after we had been in the hospital, Parker gave the carseat test a third go around and rocked it ! He was finally slowing down with his Brady's and increasing his feeds. He FINALLY was ready to leave, and we were going HOME as a FAMILY!
4th of July, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Valentines Day....
Surgeries, Ear infections, Illnesses....
A year.
365 days full of excitement, joy, tears, anxiety, stress, and pure happiness.
There have been times we didn't think we were going to make it financially, emotionally, spiritually, physically or remain sane. But we survived the Wild Ride of the 1st year with twins.
As we prepared for their Birthday Celebration, I fought back tears...my sweet miracle babies were growing up and it happend so fast. It didn't seem like 8760 hours...it seemed like 2 minutes.
Where did the time go and how did it happen so fast?
Parker got his first hair cut Friday night and within seconds he was transformed from a baby to a handsome little man. Payge is walking every which way and talking all the time (must take after her daddy LOL!!)
As the babies carried in palms today for Palm Sunday, emotions flooded me, and I felt God tug at my heart strings, without Him, my family and my awesome friends, I never would have survived these first 365 days or the many years leading up to us having a family. So sweet babies, you are more than blessings, you are miracles, lifesavers and my world.
Happy first 365 days! Here are many more seconds, minutes, hours, days, months and years to come! I love you!
12 months....
52 weeks....
365 days...
8765.8 hours....
525948.7 minutes....
31556926 seconds.....
What a whirlwind of a year it has been. It started on March 27, 2011 with me having someone drive me to the Dr. thinking I had the flu....5 days later, my sweet babies entered this world, 7 weeks early, at 4:23 and 4:24 pm weighing 4.14lbs and 4.1lbs.
The seconds that happened afterwards are a foggy blur to me...I do recall that one of the Dr.'s in the room was Dr. Butcher and I immediately asked for his first name....I remember Chris mentioning Parkers feet to me, but I didn't fully understand. I remember the Dr saying that it was 2 boys at first and I said, "What?!? It's supposed to be one of each!" and he laughed and said Baby B (Payge) was a little girl.
What I recall and what Chris recalls are completely different. I don't remember much after the babies were born, and Chris on the other hand got to cut their chords. Parkers cutting was rushed since he quit breathing on his own and had to be inubated.
Minutes later I remember meeting the Neonatilist (Dr. Miranda) who said that they were going to have to take the babies to NICU and I pushed Chris away and told him to go with them since I couldn't......
A few hours later I recall the nurse asking if I wanted visitors and I said that I didn't, but my mom and Miranda snuck back anyways....lol. I can still remember the shirt that Miranda had on and that she told everyone in the waiting room she was going to the bathroom. Man, I love my TT.
Almost a full day later, I got to see my sweet babies for the very first time. Since I had been on Oxygen due to a very low pulse/ox and had problems keeping my blood pressure down, I had not been able to see them yet. As Chris pushed me down the hall, I became full of so many emotions...joy, anxiety, nervousness and anticipation...I was about to meet my sweet babies for the very first time.
4 days later, my mom and I pulled away from the Hospital empty handed. There were no car seats or babies going home with me, and I struggled trying to realize it wasn't my fault. I cried, screamed and asked why all the way to my brother and sister in laws house where I would stay, since it was closer to the hospital. That night, I curled up and cried myself to sleep.
5 weeks later, my sweet Peanut decided to pull out her feeding tube and nipple all of her feeds, as well as pass her carseat test and sleep study test. She was ready to go home.
2 months after we had been in the hospital, Parker gave the carseat test a third go around and rocked it ! He was finally slowing down with his Brady's and increasing his feeds. He FINALLY was ready to leave, and we were going HOME as a FAMILY!
4th of July, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Valentines Day....
Surgeries, Ear infections, Illnesses....
A year.
365 days full of excitement, joy, tears, anxiety, stress, and pure happiness.
There have been times we didn't think we were going to make it financially, emotionally, spiritually, physically or remain sane. But we survived the Wild Ride of the 1st year with twins.
As we prepared for their Birthday Celebration, I fought back tears...my sweet miracle babies were growing up and it happend so fast. It didn't seem like 8760 hours...it seemed like 2 minutes.
Where did the time go and how did it happen so fast?
Parker got his first hair cut Friday night and within seconds he was transformed from a baby to a handsome little man. Payge is walking every which way and talking all the time (must take after her daddy LOL!!)
As the babies carried in palms today for Palm Sunday, emotions flooded me, and I felt God tug at my heart strings, without Him, my family and my awesome friends, I never would have survived these first 365 days or the many years leading up to us having a family. So sweet babies, you are more than blessings, you are miracles, lifesavers and my world.
Happy first 365 days! Here are many more seconds, minutes, hours, days, months and years to come! I love you!
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Molehills, Mountains, Milestones and Memories....ahhh
As I stayed home from work today with my two RSV babies, I began working on their 1st year Video. After organizing 1.6 billion photos, a strong emotion came over me and make me hit my kness praying. Thank you GOD...thank you for the molehills, the mountains, the milestones and the oh so many memories, and all after just 1 year.
Molehills:
Ear infections, strept throat, RSV, Moving, NICU for 3 weeks and PICU for 4 weeks, skull fractures, job changes, heel chord surgery, tubes placed in Payge's ears.....
Mountains: making not one, but 2 trips to Florida after losing "Santa," overcoming financial stress, allowing God to provide and take care of us during injuries, surgeries and illnesses, learning not to make "molehills into mountains"
Milestones: Parker finally passing a PT test!!, transitioning from braces, to casts to surgery to Dobbs braces and now only wearing them at night! Dad winning game #500 before resigning as the Lady Longhorn's Coach, Payge finally saying "mama," Uncle DJ FINALLY graduating college :)! From sitting up, to holding their own bottle, to signing, to eating solids, waving, talking, laughing, crusing, Payge taking her first steps....
Memories: Swimming at Fairfax Nanas house, photo shoots with Aunt Megan, shopping dates and the circus with TT, meeting and going to She-She's house for the very first time, Payge waving, Parker getting an IV for being dehydrated, going to Disney for Christmas, their screaming and terrified faces when they met Santa for the first time, sorting out their clothes as they seem to keep outgrowing everything, Pop's All State Game this summer, riding Cooper at Uncle Gary's house, Papa Smith humming and rocking Parker to sleep, picking out outfits for each holiday......
The lists for all of these just go on and on....
This first year has been full of ups and downs, bumps and bruises, tears and smiles, but it has been the most important year of my life. Yes I have been insanely busy, crazy stressed out and at times a tad bit overwhelmed....but as I compiled a video of just a mere 250 pictures....I can't help but smile, tear up a bit and close my eyes and whisper "Thank you God! Thank you for the molehills to help us face the mountains, for the bruises to make us stronger and for the memories and milestones that keep us going on..."
Sigh....I can't believe it has almost been a year.
A year since ....
I went in thinking I had the flu....
I spent a week in labor and wacked out on drugs trying to keep these babies from coming early
We spent many hours at ST JOHNS, worrying, stressing and praying for these babies....
Molehills will become what you make them.
Mountains can be moved.
Milestones will be reached.
Memories are made.
Molehills:
Ear infections, strept throat, RSV, Moving, NICU for 3 weeks and PICU for 4 weeks, skull fractures, job changes, heel chord surgery, tubes placed in Payge's ears.....
Mountains: making not one, but 2 trips to Florida after losing "Santa," overcoming financial stress, allowing God to provide and take care of us during injuries, surgeries and illnesses, learning not to make "molehills into mountains"
Milestones: Parker finally passing a PT test!!, transitioning from braces, to casts to surgery to Dobbs braces and now only wearing them at night! Dad winning game #500 before resigning as the Lady Longhorn's Coach, Payge finally saying "mama," Uncle DJ FINALLY graduating college :)! From sitting up, to holding their own bottle, to signing, to eating solids, waving, talking, laughing, crusing, Payge taking her first steps....
Memories: Swimming at Fairfax Nanas house, photo shoots with Aunt Megan, shopping dates and the circus with TT, meeting and going to She-She's house for the very first time, Payge waving, Parker getting an IV for being dehydrated, going to Disney for Christmas, their screaming and terrified faces when they met Santa for the first time, sorting out their clothes as they seem to keep outgrowing everything, Pop's All State Game this summer, riding Cooper at Uncle Gary's house, Papa Smith humming and rocking Parker to sleep, picking out outfits for each holiday......
The lists for all of these just go on and on....
This first year has been full of ups and downs, bumps and bruises, tears and smiles, but it has been the most important year of my life. Yes I have been insanely busy, crazy stressed out and at times a tad bit overwhelmed....but as I compiled a video of just a mere 250 pictures....I can't help but smile, tear up a bit and close my eyes and whisper "Thank you God! Thank you for the molehills to help us face the mountains, for the bruises to make us stronger and for the memories and milestones that keep us going on..."
Sigh....I can't believe it has almost been a year.
A year since ....
I went in thinking I had the flu....
I spent a week in labor and wacked out on drugs trying to keep these babies from coming early
We spent many hours at ST JOHNS, worrying, stressing and praying for these babies....
Molehills will become what you make them.
Mountains can be moved.
Milestones will be reached.
Memories are made.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Flying Time...
Where oh where does the time fly??!?
I have not been able to blog in several weeks...and I will tell you why.
My sweet little Payge experienced ear infection #5 and failed her hearing test, so we were referred to an ENT and had tubes put in last Friday. She had a rocky few days, but now is feeling much better. I can't believe the world of difference that it has already made.
Another time period has flown by quickly here at Hickory Hills....basketball season. This season is more important to us than many holidays and often birthdays. Dad's team was beat out last week and DJ's team is still battling thru the losers bracket into Area. This season has been great for the babies. Dad experienced win #500 on Valentine's Day this year and we were all there to experience it! What a huge milestone for an amazing man! Even though DJ's games occur after P2's bedtime, we have made it to a few games to support their silly uncle. Noting that the State Tournament is just a little over a week away, this season sure has flown by.
The babies are "cruising" and attempting to walk on their own. Payge took 3 steps last night before freaking out and falling down! Parker loves to hold your hand and walk around the living room. He recently had a check up at OU Medical with his surgeon, and got new braces. They were also concerned with a sitting position he does, so we went back to Summit Therapy, where he passed with flying colors.
This past weekend, I had a breakdown in Walgreen's while I was doing their First Birthday Invitations. I can't believe that in 5 weeks, my sweet babies will be 1 year old!
Where has the time gone??
Why do the good times seem to fly by??
It seems like only yesterday that I was looking out the back window, leaving the hospital, without my sweet babies. It seems like only last week that we finally made it HOME as a family. It seems like just the other day that we did the "right thing" for our family and moved back here. I know for a fact that it was just yesterday that they could hold their own bottle.....and now they are almost 1??!!?
I can't believe that it has been almost a year since I went in to labor, just 8 weeks early, and Miranda could have sworn I was having Braxton Hicks and insisted on taking me to Red Devil for Ice Cream! There is no way that we have already celebrated their First Easter, 4th of July, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Holy Cow! How did we already survive two trips to Florida, 2 surgeries, a skull fracture and several colds, coughs and ear infections???
Where did the time go?
Time flies.
Take each and every moment for what its worth and do not waste one second. Nothing is guarenteed or granted to you. God did not make any promises about time to you. Enjoy it. Live it. Love it.
Thank you God for making each and every minute of this past year, and the journey beforehand "enjoyable." Thank you family and friends for holding our hands, helping our hearts and hearing our prayers!
Time flies.....soak every minute of it up. Hang on for the ride. Take a deep breath.
I have not been able to blog in several weeks...and I will tell you why.
My sweet little Payge experienced ear infection #5 and failed her hearing test, so we were referred to an ENT and had tubes put in last Friday. She had a rocky few days, but now is feeling much better. I can't believe the world of difference that it has already made.
Another time period has flown by quickly here at Hickory Hills....basketball season. This season is more important to us than many holidays and often birthdays. Dad's team was beat out last week and DJ's team is still battling thru the losers bracket into Area. This season has been great for the babies. Dad experienced win #500 on Valentine's Day this year and we were all there to experience it! What a huge milestone for an amazing man! Even though DJ's games occur after P2's bedtime, we have made it to a few games to support their silly uncle. Noting that the State Tournament is just a little over a week away, this season sure has flown by.
The babies are "cruising" and attempting to walk on their own. Payge took 3 steps last night before freaking out and falling down! Parker loves to hold your hand and walk around the living room. He recently had a check up at OU Medical with his surgeon, and got new braces. They were also concerned with a sitting position he does, so we went back to Summit Therapy, where he passed with flying colors.
This past weekend, I had a breakdown in Walgreen's while I was doing their First Birthday Invitations. I can't believe that in 5 weeks, my sweet babies will be 1 year old!
Where has the time gone??
Why do the good times seem to fly by??
It seems like only yesterday that I was looking out the back window, leaving the hospital, without my sweet babies. It seems like only last week that we finally made it HOME as a family. It seems like just the other day that we did the "right thing" for our family and moved back here. I know for a fact that it was just yesterday that they could hold their own bottle.....and now they are almost 1??!!?
I can't believe that it has been almost a year since I went in to labor, just 8 weeks early, and Miranda could have sworn I was having Braxton Hicks and insisted on taking me to Red Devil for Ice Cream! There is no way that we have already celebrated their First Easter, 4th of July, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Holy Cow! How did we already survive two trips to Florida, 2 surgeries, a skull fracture and several colds, coughs and ear infections???
Where did the time go?
Time flies.
Take each and every moment for what its worth and do not waste one second. Nothing is guarenteed or granted to you. God did not make any promises about time to you. Enjoy it. Live it. Love it.
Thank you God for making each and every minute of this past year, and the journey beforehand "enjoyable." Thank you family and friends for holding our hands, helping our hearts and hearing our prayers!
Time flies.....soak every minute of it up. Hang on for the ride. Take a deep breath.
Monday, January 16, 2012
Finding Strength....
It has been almost 10 months since God placed P2 in our lives, but our journey with them and for them started way before that....
I can still recall the day that I had the surgey that would "help" us have children, the shots, the medications and finally the doctors appointment when my doctor told me she could no longer help me and that it was time to see a specialist. Chris was gone on a fishing trip that Spring Break, so of course my mom was with me. She comforted me, she consoled me, she lended me a shoulder to cry on. She helped me find my strength.
After many hours, many miles and many dollars we found out that we were going to become parents. Dreams come true. We found Parker's heartbeat around 8 weeks and then heard Payge's around 10-11 weeks. That is when it hit me. Our years of aching to be parents was now just a few months away. I cried, for joy, for happiness, for anxiety (for those of you who really know me, you know that I am a VERY anxious person). But once again, I found strength.
The invitro process was not kind to my body. At one point in time, I was up to 5 injections a day. Now, for a person who cries and looks away when they draw blood, this is painful. Luckily I have awesome friends in the medical field who taught Chris how to do the ones in my belly and thighs while they did the IM ones in my hips. It was hard. I recall a time during a softball game that I had to call time, run behind the dugout with Chris and let him stab me twice, then back onto the field (the drugs had to be given every so many hours). I had bruises, blood stained clothes. But, still somehow managed to find my strength.
When the babies surprised us all and ironically were born on April's Fools day, 7 weeks early, I was heartbroken. It took me several days to realize that they were going to be ok. When we first came home as a family, life was way harder than I thought was possible, and when Parker had to be put under and have surgery, I broke down. But when it was all said and done, I survived because I found strength.
Now, as we go back to sleepless nights due to colds, teething and interupted sleep patterns, we dig deep for our strength. We worry that we get frustrated, we cry because we are tired, we laugh to keep from screaming....but we will again, find our strength.
God has been through this journey with us from day one. He knew we would struggle, but welcome to reality. Life isn't all easy, breezy and full of "perfections." Life will certianly hand you a fair share of bumps, bruises and crushed hearts along the way, but God will never give your more than you can handle. He will find a way to fill you with strength, even when you feel like you are running on an empty tank.
This weekend God restored my strength. We had some beautiful weather and we were able to take the babies for a jog at the lake as well as play some on the playground. To hear them giggle while they are swinging or laugh while we race up the hill, is refreshing, and rewarding. Becoming and being a parent has not been the easiest journey for us right now, but it could be worse. I have never had a miscarriage, or loss a child due to death. I have been blessed with twins, even though it is hard at times, it is a blessing.
So God, thank you for renewing me. Thank you for every bump, bruise and tear along the way of this journey and thank you for the people you have placed in my life to help me find the strength and to remind me to turn to You when I feel that I am running low. Thank you for a husband who hears my worries, alternates night shifts and loves being a "adada" Thank you for friends who are just a phone call or text away. Thank you for a family who is an amazing support group and doesn't mind being our "village" in raising these two sweet babies. But God, THANK YOU for allowing me to turn to you, for helping me fight back the tears and for making my dream of wanting to be a mom come true.
Find strength. In all you do, find strength.
I can still recall the day that I had the surgey that would "help" us have children, the shots, the medications and finally the doctors appointment when my doctor told me she could no longer help me and that it was time to see a specialist. Chris was gone on a fishing trip that Spring Break, so of course my mom was with me. She comforted me, she consoled me, she lended me a shoulder to cry on. She helped me find my strength.
After many hours, many miles and many dollars we found out that we were going to become parents. Dreams come true. We found Parker's heartbeat around 8 weeks and then heard Payge's around 10-11 weeks. That is when it hit me. Our years of aching to be parents was now just a few months away. I cried, for joy, for happiness, for anxiety (for those of you who really know me, you know that I am a VERY anxious person). But once again, I found strength.
The invitro process was not kind to my body. At one point in time, I was up to 5 injections a day. Now, for a person who cries and looks away when they draw blood, this is painful. Luckily I have awesome friends in the medical field who taught Chris how to do the ones in my belly and thighs while they did the IM ones in my hips. It was hard. I recall a time during a softball game that I had to call time, run behind the dugout with Chris and let him stab me twice, then back onto the field (the drugs had to be given every so many hours). I had bruises, blood stained clothes. But, still somehow managed to find my strength.
When the babies surprised us all and ironically were born on April's Fools day, 7 weeks early, I was heartbroken. It took me several days to realize that they were going to be ok. When we first came home as a family, life was way harder than I thought was possible, and when Parker had to be put under and have surgery, I broke down. But when it was all said and done, I survived because I found strength.
Now, as we go back to sleepless nights due to colds, teething and interupted sleep patterns, we dig deep for our strength. We worry that we get frustrated, we cry because we are tired, we laugh to keep from screaming....but we will again, find our strength.
God has been through this journey with us from day one. He knew we would struggle, but welcome to reality. Life isn't all easy, breezy and full of "perfections." Life will certianly hand you a fair share of bumps, bruises and crushed hearts along the way, but God will never give your more than you can handle. He will find a way to fill you with strength, even when you feel like you are running on an empty tank.
This weekend God restored my strength. We had some beautiful weather and we were able to take the babies for a jog at the lake as well as play some on the playground. To hear them giggle while they are swinging or laugh while we race up the hill, is refreshing, and rewarding. Becoming and being a parent has not been the easiest journey for us right now, but it could be worse. I have never had a miscarriage, or loss a child due to death. I have been blessed with twins, even though it is hard at times, it is a blessing.
So God, thank you for renewing me. Thank you for every bump, bruise and tear along the way of this journey and thank you for the people you have placed in my life to help me find the strength and to remind me to turn to You when I feel that I am running low. Thank you for a husband who hears my worries, alternates night shifts and loves being a "adada" Thank you for friends who are just a phone call or text away. Thank you for a family who is an amazing support group and doesn't mind being our "village" in raising these two sweet babies. But God, THANK YOU for allowing me to turn to you, for helping me fight back the tears and for making my dream of wanting to be a mom come true.
Find strength. In all you do, find strength.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Therapy Session
Instead of paying $150 some odd bucks for therapy session, I figured I could blog.....
So for far warning, take what I type in stride and realize that even though I am fighting back tears of stress, I still am laughing on the inside and have a strong sense of humor....
I have many friends who have recently entered "Motherhood." I also have a select few of friends who have not quite yet had the "joy" of doing so. This can bring on some interesting conversations. Most of my "motherhood" friends are strong, amazing women who smile through it all. I have friends who are single moms, moms of multiples. struggling moms, stay at home moms, working moms, and some who are even Head Coaches of a sport or two. Phew. Praise mom's of all kind.
Many of you know that our journey to parenthood was a struggle. The way I see it, it could have been easier, but then again, it could have been harder. We were blessed with Parker and Payge and not a day goes by that I don't thank God for making me a Mom. But goodness gracious....why didn't someone tell me how hard it was going to be??? I, in all honesty, thought being a Mom was full of playing and laughing and cute dress up clothes. I had no idea that I would struggle, or even cry at times.
I have a good friend who is an amazing mom. She is actually one of the people I call about any concern I have. I have seen her stay up late with her son to play dinosaurs, or watch movies, wake up early with a fussy girl. I have seen her smile, laugh, enjoy. I didn't see what happend behind closed doors. I have another good friend who is a mom of 3 and has a set of twin boys. I called her while I locked myself in my bedroom and asked her if it was ok to cry? Not only did she laugh at me, she encouraged me to cry. She down right said that it was ok not to be supermom and to let the tears fall.
I have a fear. I fear that God will see my frustrations, my tears and think that I am ungrateful. I am far from ungrateful. I am often overwhelmed, but I love having twins. I fear that if I say "1 baby is easy" then God will think I can't handle it and something will happen to one of my sweet babies. A fear. A fear that I feel in my mind but know in my heart that luckily we don't serve a mean and evil God.
People often stop and ask us how life with twins is. My only reply, "interesting." Others have hurt my feelings by questioning why I keep my kiddos on a schedule, but not only do I do it for them, I do it for myself. I love the fact that if we are on schedule, they are down for the night no later than 7:45pm. I enjoy the fact that I know for a fact they will take a great morning nap and on the weekends I fully take advantage of it. But it seems like no sooner than I get one of strept throat or an ear infection, the next one is coming down with something. It never fails that I get one calmed down from pulling up and knocking their head on something, that the next one is screaming about being stuck under a table or something. Its endless. Its tiring. Its "interesting" to say the least.
So, welcome to "motherhood." Where a sense of humor can go a long ways. All your supermom's out there, lets band together. Pour yourself a glass of wine, lock the bedroom door, cry into your pillow....but never forget to Thank God for your sweet baby (or babies). Never forget that there is always someone to talk to, to calm you down or hear your cry.
Hang in there Mommies!!!
God Speed!
So for far warning, take what I type in stride and realize that even though I am fighting back tears of stress, I still am laughing on the inside and have a strong sense of humor....
I have many friends who have recently entered "Motherhood." I also have a select few of friends who have not quite yet had the "joy" of doing so. This can bring on some interesting conversations. Most of my "motherhood" friends are strong, amazing women who smile through it all. I have friends who are single moms, moms of multiples. struggling moms, stay at home moms, working moms, and some who are even Head Coaches of a sport or two. Phew. Praise mom's of all kind.
Many of you know that our journey to parenthood was a struggle. The way I see it, it could have been easier, but then again, it could have been harder. We were blessed with Parker and Payge and not a day goes by that I don't thank God for making me a Mom. But goodness gracious....why didn't someone tell me how hard it was going to be??? I, in all honesty, thought being a Mom was full of playing and laughing and cute dress up clothes. I had no idea that I would struggle, or even cry at times.
I have a good friend who is an amazing mom. She is actually one of the people I call about any concern I have. I have seen her stay up late with her son to play dinosaurs, or watch movies, wake up early with a fussy girl. I have seen her smile, laugh, enjoy. I didn't see what happend behind closed doors. I have another good friend who is a mom of 3 and has a set of twin boys. I called her while I locked myself in my bedroom and asked her if it was ok to cry? Not only did she laugh at me, she encouraged me to cry. She down right said that it was ok not to be supermom and to let the tears fall.
I have a fear. I fear that God will see my frustrations, my tears and think that I am ungrateful. I am far from ungrateful. I am often overwhelmed, but I love having twins. I fear that if I say "1 baby is easy" then God will think I can't handle it and something will happen to one of my sweet babies. A fear. A fear that I feel in my mind but know in my heart that luckily we don't serve a mean and evil God.
People often stop and ask us how life with twins is. My only reply, "interesting." Others have hurt my feelings by questioning why I keep my kiddos on a schedule, but not only do I do it for them, I do it for myself. I love the fact that if we are on schedule, they are down for the night no later than 7:45pm. I enjoy the fact that I know for a fact they will take a great morning nap and on the weekends I fully take advantage of it. But it seems like no sooner than I get one of strept throat or an ear infection, the next one is coming down with something. It never fails that I get one calmed down from pulling up and knocking their head on something, that the next one is screaming about being stuck under a table or something. Its endless. Its tiring. Its "interesting" to say the least.
So, welcome to "motherhood." Where a sense of humor can go a long ways. All your supermom's out there, lets band together. Pour yourself a glass of wine, lock the bedroom door, cry into your pillow....but never forget to Thank God for your sweet baby (or babies). Never forget that there is always someone to talk to, to calm you down or hear your cry.
Hang in there Mommies!!!
God Speed!
Saturday, December 31, 2011
2011...full of Hello's and Good-byes
Good-bye 2011
Good-bye sports car, coaching bag, home ownership
Good-bye best friend across the street, hourly wages, my basketball girls
Good-bye sleeping in and date nights.....
Good-bye Uncle Tom, Chris' great-Aunts, and other loved ones.....
2011 came and went with a bang. It was full of adventures, difficulties, trials, hardships, milestones, memories and the most life changing moment of all....I became a Mom!
This time last year, we had our "Nugget Reveal" party and which we found out that God had blessed us with a sweet baby boy and a precious baby girl. Wow. Twins. One of each. How could we not feel blessed?
Now our sweet little boy is crawling everywhere, pulling himself up and trying to take steps. He has his 2 bottom teeth and trying to get in his top ones. He has had surgery, cardio visits, casts, numerous trips to OU Children's Medical and now....strept throat. He is a trooper. He carries the "Dean" (named after my dad) name well.:)
My precious baby girl is now quite larger than her birthweight (which was 4 lbs 1 oz). She is a social butterfly and loves to wave. The smallest things excite her and she has a smile that can light up the room.
2011 brought us excitement, joy, tears and smiles.
Little did we know that we would get to experience the NICU and PICU at ST. John's Hospital for several weeks. Little did I know that my children would never meet the most famous "Santa" of all.
Ironically, my children were born on April Fool's Day. 4 years earlier, I played a prank on my dad, texting him "I'm pregnant!" He was so excited....until I told him that it was just an April Fool's joke. Ironic. When P2 was born, our lives changed. I traded in my coaching bag for a diaper bag, my sports car for a SUV, my early nights and late mornings for just the opposite. But they brought more than change. They brought joy, smiles, excitiement and often tears (some of joy....some not so much).
In 2011, our lives also changed when Chris was finally offerend a certified teaching position. Something we had both wanted, and needed, and prayed for for so long. We took the leap of faith 3 days before school started. We listed our home. Our first home that we loved such much. We left our friends, our community and our jobs. We patiently prayed and God answered. God provided us a place to stay (thank God for parents), 2 certified jobs (first time in 5 years) and a person to lease our home to. Change can often be good. We miss our friends, who became family. But we know that God has a great plan for us and this is just part of his plan.
In 2011, we lost many loved ones. One that I still have a hard time dealing with is my Uncle Tom. My "Santa" was beyond amazing, above great and full of love. He worked hard, smiled big and gave amazing hugs. When we got the news in June, we had only been home from the hospital for a short time, but there was no doubt in my mind that we need to make the journey to say our "see ya later" to him. We piled up the luggage and crammed into the truck to make the journey. It was rough. It was hard traveling with 4 month old twins for 22 hours in truck. It was hard seeing our gentle giant just lay in a hospital bed hooked up to so many machines. It was hard trying to find the "right words" to say to my aunt and cousins. The day we lost him, 4th of July, was a very hard day on the whole family. We ventured back down to Florida for Christmas 2011 to bond as a family to mourn him. Christmas was such a special time because of his role as Santa.He is deeply missed and never forgotten. RIP Santa.
In 2011, we experienced change, loss, joy, heartache, confussion and so much more. But in all, God took care of us. He provided for us. He showed us the way when it was too dark for us to see.
As the babies are now only 3 short months to their 1st birthday, I can only hope and pray that God will continue to bless us, support us and encourage us.
So Hello 2012
Hello diaper bags, Mom mobiles, new opportunities
Hello long distance friendships, long nights, and lack of sleep...
2012...we welcome you and we continue to count our blessings, pray our prayers and smile through it all.
2012, I pray that you bring strength when we cannot seem to find it, healing for the wounded and heartbroken and joy to those who need it.
Good-bye sports car, coaching bag, home ownership
Good-bye best friend across the street, hourly wages, my basketball girls
Good-bye sleeping in and date nights.....
Good-bye Uncle Tom, Chris' great-Aunts, and other loved ones.....
2011 came and went with a bang. It was full of adventures, difficulties, trials, hardships, milestones, memories and the most life changing moment of all....I became a Mom!
This time last year, we had our "Nugget Reveal" party and which we found out that God had blessed us with a sweet baby boy and a precious baby girl. Wow. Twins. One of each. How could we not feel blessed?
Now our sweet little boy is crawling everywhere, pulling himself up and trying to take steps. He has his 2 bottom teeth and trying to get in his top ones. He has had surgery, cardio visits, casts, numerous trips to OU Children's Medical and now....strept throat. He is a trooper. He carries the "Dean" (named after my dad) name well.:)
My precious baby girl is now quite larger than her birthweight (which was 4 lbs 1 oz). She is a social butterfly and loves to wave. The smallest things excite her and she has a smile that can light up the room.
2011 brought us excitement, joy, tears and smiles.
Little did we know that we would get to experience the NICU and PICU at ST. John's Hospital for several weeks. Little did I know that my children would never meet the most famous "Santa" of all.
Ironically, my children were born on April Fool's Day. 4 years earlier, I played a prank on my dad, texting him "I'm pregnant!" He was so excited....until I told him that it was just an April Fool's joke. Ironic. When P2 was born, our lives changed. I traded in my coaching bag for a diaper bag, my sports car for a SUV, my early nights and late mornings for just the opposite. But they brought more than change. They brought joy, smiles, excitiement and often tears (some of joy....some not so much).
In 2011, our lives also changed when Chris was finally offerend a certified teaching position. Something we had both wanted, and needed, and prayed for for so long. We took the leap of faith 3 days before school started. We listed our home. Our first home that we loved such much. We left our friends, our community and our jobs. We patiently prayed and God answered. God provided us a place to stay (thank God for parents), 2 certified jobs (first time in 5 years) and a person to lease our home to. Change can often be good. We miss our friends, who became family. But we know that God has a great plan for us and this is just part of his plan.
In 2011, we lost many loved ones. One that I still have a hard time dealing with is my Uncle Tom. My "Santa" was beyond amazing, above great and full of love. He worked hard, smiled big and gave amazing hugs. When we got the news in June, we had only been home from the hospital for a short time, but there was no doubt in my mind that we need to make the journey to say our "see ya later" to him. We piled up the luggage and crammed into the truck to make the journey. It was rough. It was hard traveling with 4 month old twins for 22 hours in truck. It was hard seeing our gentle giant just lay in a hospital bed hooked up to so many machines. It was hard trying to find the "right words" to say to my aunt and cousins. The day we lost him, 4th of July, was a very hard day on the whole family. We ventured back down to Florida for Christmas 2011 to bond as a family to mourn him. Christmas was such a special time because of his role as Santa.He is deeply missed and never forgotten. RIP Santa.
In 2011, we experienced change, loss, joy, heartache, confussion and so much more. But in all, God took care of us. He provided for us. He showed us the way when it was too dark for us to see.
As the babies are now only 3 short months to their 1st birthday, I can only hope and pray that God will continue to bless us, support us and encourage us.
So Hello 2012
Hello diaper bags, Mom mobiles, new opportunities
Hello long distance friendships, long nights, and lack of sleep...
2012...we welcome you and we continue to count our blessings, pray our prayers and smile through it all.
2012, I pray that you bring strength when we cannot seem to find it, healing for the wounded and heartbroken and joy to those who need it.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
First Thanksgiving....
Where has the time gone? Since April 1, time has flown by. We have celebrated Easter, Memorial Day, 4th of July, Halloween and now P2 first Thanksgiving. Our family doesn't have much of a Thankgiving Tradition. The past 2 years, Chris' has been at football practice helping prepare a team for the Play-Offs. Half of our family is 1300 miles away and they celebrate at my Aunt's house in Orlando, so we have usually been divided on Thanksgiving, with some going one way while other's head a different direction. I am thankful, however, that my mom has always been flexable and understanding and prepared a Thanksgiving meal on a day which works best for everyone. She never complains about having to fix the turkey by herself ( I have NO desire to learn or help prepare a turkey, not in my blood I suppose) but she does like it when we help with the pies and tarts.
This year, God has taught us to be thankful for so much, even the little things. For years we tried to have children, and then we were blessed with 2 babies, who were born prematurely. But we were thankful. We were thankful because even though we spent weeks in the NICU and PICU, we met wonderful nurses, had an amazing support system and our babies were healthy, so much stronger than others. Thankful. When we took the leap of Faith and moved back "home" without us both having jobs, we were scared, worried. But as we waited patiently, God provided for us. We went months without a paycheck, but thankfully we now have 2, full time, certified jobs. Grateful. We were concerned with leaving our wonderful friends behind, and even though no one can ever replace them, we have learned to reach out of our comfort zone and meet several new people. Blessed. Worried about not having someone to leave P2 with during the days mom had to work was a major hardship for us. I do not like leaving them. I worry, stress, overanalyze. But God had His hand in our lives and showed us the way to an amazing sitter who knows my fears. Wowed.
Be Thankful.
God works even in the smallest of ways.
Be Thankful that you:
-Have family who loves you
-have a HOME
-have babies who want to snuggle
- have a car that gets you from point A to point B
-have a mom (or aunt) prepares the Turkey for your feast
-have a husband who has had the opportunity to coach and be involved in successful programs
Be thankful for your "Haves" and don't worry about your "have not's
Be Thankful. Count your blessings.
This year, God has taught us to be thankful for so much, even the little things. For years we tried to have children, and then we were blessed with 2 babies, who were born prematurely. But we were thankful. We were thankful because even though we spent weeks in the NICU and PICU, we met wonderful nurses, had an amazing support system and our babies were healthy, so much stronger than others. Thankful. When we took the leap of Faith and moved back "home" without us both having jobs, we were scared, worried. But as we waited patiently, God provided for us. We went months without a paycheck, but thankfully we now have 2, full time, certified jobs. Grateful. We were concerned with leaving our wonderful friends behind, and even though no one can ever replace them, we have learned to reach out of our comfort zone and meet several new people. Blessed. Worried about not having someone to leave P2 with during the days mom had to work was a major hardship for us. I do not like leaving them. I worry, stress, overanalyze. But God had His hand in our lives and showed us the way to an amazing sitter who knows my fears. Wowed.
Be Thankful.
God works even in the smallest of ways.
Be Thankful that you:
-Have family who loves you
-have a HOME
-have babies who want to snuggle
- have a car that gets you from point A to point B
-have a mom (or aunt) prepares the Turkey for your feast
-have a husband who has had the opportunity to coach and be involved in successful programs
Be thankful for your "Haves" and don't worry about your "have not's
Be Thankful. Count your blessings.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Falling Down....
Growing up, I was possibly the most uncordinated, clumsiest, ungraceful "athlete" you could come across. I could shoot a jumpshot, invented the "Ott Flop" and go 98% from the freethrow but I would be the one that fell in the lunch line, tripped over the imaginary line or fell out of my seat. Being coordinated (with the exception of hand/eye coordination at the plate) was not something I was blessed with. I often got bruises or skinned up knees for falling down.
Recently, I have been doing alot of falling. Falling as a person, struggling in a new workplace, failing as a wife and friend.....but gone are the skinned up knees and bruises. Hello crushed heart and devestated ego. Welcome to a life of uncertianty, uncoordination. Being new to a workplace in the middle of the year is a huge transition. Going from a fit, athletic body to a "I JUST had twins" body is confidence breaking. Transitioning from a Head coach to just being a 2nd grade teacher is ego altering.
It seems like my dreams have been falling apart and I am left with a tired, broken heart, mind and spirit. But then I remember I am not alone. I have someone who loves me, even with my mom jeans and teacher voice. I often forget that God made me a promise, a promise that He would always be with me. That even when I fall, time and time again, God is there, patiently waiting to help me off the ground and shake the dirt off.
Too often, it seems as if we have to fall "one too many times" before we remember to look up. To look up for the hope that we need, or for the peace we need to refill us and help us realize that we can do it and with each and every fall we become a little stronger....or in my case, more stubborn.
I know I will continue to stumble and fall, but deep down inside I know that what doesn't break me, only makes me stronger. I will not let the falls get me down. I will not let the falls break my spirit. I will not let the falls tire me or allow me to grow weary. Next time I fall, instead of looking around to see what caused it, I will look up and see God patiently sticking His hand out to me once again.....
Recently, I have been doing alot of falling. Falling as a person, struggling in a new workplace, failing as a wife and friend.....but gone are the skinned up knees and bruises. Hello crushed heart and devestated ego. Welcome to a life of uncertianty, uncoordination. Being new to a workplace in the middle of the year is a huge transition. Going from a fit, athletic body to a "I JUST had twins" body is confidence breaking. Transitioning from a Head coach to just being a 2nd grade teacher is ego altering.
It seems like my dreams have been falling apart and I am left with a tired, broken heart, mind and spirit. But then I remember I am not alone. I have someone who loves me, even with my mom jeans and teacher voice. I often forget that God made me a promise, a promise that He would always be with me. That even when I fall, time and time again, God is there, patiently waiting to help me off the ground and shake the dirt off.
Too often, it seems as if we have to fall "one too many times" before we remember to look up. To look up for the hope that we need, or for the peace we need to refill us and help us realize that we can do it and with each and every fall we become a little stronger....or in my case, more stubborn.
I know I will continue to stumble and fall, but deep down inside I know that what doesn't break me, only makes me stronger. I will not let the falls get me down. I will not let the falls break my spirit. I will not let the falls tire me or allow me to grow weary. Next time I fall, instead of looking around to see what caused it, I will look up and see God patiently sticking His hand out to me once again.....
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Sir Parker Son
Dear Sweet Parker:
You love to snuggle and rock with your Pop. Your smile and laugh light up my heart and world. I cry every night we put on your Dobbs braces but I smile because I have seen such progress. Your teething process equals sleepless nights for us all, but I enjoy the moments we get to cuddle or when you reach up for me. The day you were born, you didn't breath on your own, and when the doctor told me about your feet, I felt like I had done something wrong. I cried for you, I hurt for you....you are my sweet little boy. My sweet 4lb little boy who now wears high water pants because in order for them to fit you in your tiny waist, they reach your shins. The day we first got you casted, I cried. I ached for you. But you are strong. You are so strong they had to put a stage 3 plaster on your cast because you would kick and kick. I hated holding you down. I hated finding out you had to have surgery. I prayed and prayed and prayed. Prayed that you would be ok. I prayed that I would be ok. God knew.God knew we would make it through Sir. God has been with us every step of the way. Through endless carseat tests, to cardiologist appointments, surgery, and now on to PT appointments, God has been with us every step of the way. God is in my heart sweet boy and I can only pray that I can one day instill Him in yours. You are now endlessly trying to catch up with your sister but you are more content to play in your bouncer or sit up by yourself and play with your rattle or football. You don't like to sleep in your crib unless you have your seahorse and "tig tig". But you are my sweet boy. Its ironic how much you look like Conner, with your light hair and ocean blue eyes. Its side splitting how much you laugh at your silly Pop and painful how good your grip is (especially when you pull my hair out in clumps!) I love you Sir Dean. I have many hopes and dreams for you. I still hurt for you, but as my prayers for you continue always,the pain slowly slips away and my heart is filled with joy, love and dreams for you.
I love ya big guy!
Love MaMaMaMa
You love to snuggle and rock with your Pop. Your smile and laugh light up my heart and world. I cry every night we put on your Dobbs braces but I smile because I have seen such progress. Your teething process equals sleepless nights for us all, but I enjoy the moments we get to cuddle or when you reach up for me. The day you were born, you didn't breath on your own, and when the doctor told me about your feet, I felt like I had done something wrong. I cried for you, I hurt for you....you are my sweet little boy. My sweet 4lb little boy who now wears high water pants because in order for them to fit you in your tiny waist, they reach your shins. The day we first got you casted, I cried. I ached for you. But you are strong. You are so strong they had to put a stage 3 plaster on your cast because you would kick and kick. I hated holding you down. I hated finding out you had to have surgery. I prayed and prayed and prayed. Prayed that you would be ok. I prayed that I would be ok. God knew.God knew we would make it through Sir. God has been with us every step of the way. Through endless carseat tests, to cardiologist appointments, surgery, and now on to PT appointments, God has been with us every step of the way. God is in my heart sweet boy and I can only pray that I can one day instill Him in yours. You are now endlessly trying to catch up with your sister but you are more content to play in your bouncer or sit up by yourself and play with your rattle or football. You don't like to sleep in your crib unless you have your seahorse and "tig tig". But you are my sweet boy. Its ironic how much you look like Conner, with your light hair and ocean blue eyes. Its side splitting how much you laugh at your silly Pop and painful how good your grip is (especially when you pull my hair out in clumps!) I love you Sir Dean. I have many hopes and dreams for you. I still hurt for you, but as my prayers for you continue always,the pain slowly slips away and my heart is filled with joy, love and dreams for you.
I love ya big guy!
Love MaMaMaMa
Monday, November 7, 2011
Paygie Girl
"Paygie Girl, don't you know that I love you....."
(song lyrics stolen from EYB, adjusted by Dede and myself...)
My sweet sweet Payge Elizabeth,
you are 7 months old and "crawling" all over. You bang your head on tile floors, tv stands and baby equipment. You shrill like a dinosaur and giggle at my dancing. You love to swim in the bathtub and kick your legs like a little froggie. I will never forget the day I saw you, how worried I was when you wouldn't take a bottle and you kept spitting up, your precious purple and brown preemie onsie you wore in the hospital, how I cried because I didn't think you liked me, how annoyed you got when your brothers monitors kept going off, the day you pulled the feeding tube out and took a whole bottle so you could come home! I never want to relive the night you were hit in the head with a softball or when we had to hold you down for your CT scan. I love dressing you up, how active you are and that your eyebrows and stork bite get bright red when you are upset! I love you Paygie girl. I never thought I could handle a daughter, a girl...a girlie girl at that. But my heart melts everytime I hold you, or when you let me rock you or how you scream when I leave the room. I love you Paygie girl, and I never knew this kind of love before. You are a stinker, which makes you your momma's girl. :) You love your fruits, veggies, bottle...well you love food! You love squirming all over the place and you love your DeDe. You get a kick out of watching Pop singing and dancing for you and you even try to join in. But Payge, please never forget how much I love you. Please always remember that I prayed for you, before I even met you, and that I continue to pray and pray and pray for you. I pray that I can instill God and faith in your heart like DeDe did for me. I pray that you won't date or even like boys until your are 35. I pray that you will avoid HS drama and just play sports (or be in the band *sigh) and that you put 110% in everything you do. I pray that you have awesome friends like momma does and that you will never think my dancing or singing are "lame." I love you Paygie girl....Momma loves you and I thank God several times a day for blessing me with a sweet precious beautiful little girl. Thank you. Thank you Peanut for completing my world.
Love,
your mommy
(song lyrics stolen from EYB, adjusted by Dede and myself...)
My sweet sweet Payge Elizabeth,
you are 7 months old and "crawling" all over. You bang your head on tile floors, tv stands and baby equipment. You shrill like a dinosaur and giggle at my dancing. You love to swim in the bathtub and kick your legs like a little froggie. I will never forget the day I saw you, how worried I was when you wouldn't take a bottle and you kept spitting up, your precious purple and brown preemie onsie you wore in the hospital, how I cried because I didn't think you liked me, how annoyed you got when your brothers monitors kept going off, the day you pulled the feeding tube out and took a whole bottle so you could come home! I never want to relive the night you were hit in the head with a softball or when we had to hold you down for your CT scan. I love dressing you up, how active you are and that your eyebrows and stork bite get bright red when you are upset! I love you Paygie girl. I never thought I could handle a daughter, a girl...a girlie girl at that. But my heart melts everytime I hold you, or when you let me rock you or how you scream when I leave the room. I love you Paygie girl, and I never knew this kind of love before. You are a stinker, which makes you your momma's girl. :) You love your fruits, veggies, bottle...well you love food! You love squirming all over the place and you love your DeDe. You get a kick out of watching Pop singing and dancing for you and you even try to join in. But Payge, please never forget how much I love you. Please always remember that I prayed for you, before I even met you, and that I continue to pray and pray and pray for you. I pray that I can instill God and faith in your heart like DeDe did for me. I pray that you won't date or even like boys until your are 35. I pray that you will avoid HS drama and just play sports (or be in the band *sigh) and that you put 110% in everything you do. I pray that you have awesome friends like momma does and that you will never think my dancing or singing are "lame." I love you Paygie girl....Momma loves you and I thank God several times a day for blessing me with a sweet precious beautiful little girl. Thank you. Thank you Peanut for completing my world.
Love,
your mommy
What are your resources?
Last Wednesday night, at Church, Pastor Ray asked us what our best resources were? Instantly, I thought "my friends and my family are my best resources."
Some said their cookbooks, while others said prayer, but I stuck to my guns. Without my family and my friends, I would not be where I am today. Without my family sticking by our side when we struggled to become parents or helping us financially become parents, I wouldn't have P2. Without my friends calling, texting, praying or visiting while the babies were in NICU, I wouldn't have survived. My family, my faith, my friends. What more could you need? What more could you desire? What keeps you ticking?
I will never forget the day that we brought both babies home and a friend made a pallet in the babies floor to help us throughout the night. I will never forget a friend that came over daily, for 10 weeks+ to give me my injections. I can never forget my faith, that was instilled in me at such a young age, to help me overcome days of sorrow, days of pity, days of negativity.
So be resourceful. Find resources. Positive resources that help you survive, manage, go without sleep.
Some said their cookbooks, while others said prayer, but I stuck to my guns. Without my family and my friends, I would not be where I am today. Without my family sticking by our side when we struggled to become parents or helping us financially become parents, I wouldn't have P2. Without my friends calling, texting, praying or visiting while the babies were in NICU, I wouldn't have survived. My family, my faith, my friends. What more could you need? What more could you desire? What keeps you ticking?
I will never forget the day that we brought both babies home and a friend made a pallet in the babies floor to help us throughout the night. I will never forget a friend that came over daily, for 10 weeks+ to give me my injections. I can never forget my faith, that was instilled in me at such a young age, to help me overcome days of sorrow, days of pity, days of negativity.
So be resourceful. Find resources. Positive resources that help you survive, manage, go without sleep.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
The Choices you make....
Today during church we sang "Amazing Grace," one of my dad's favorite songs, and God used it to teach me about choices. It hit me that often we choose to be busy and drive 70mph in a 55mph just to rush and hurry up to get somewhere.
We hear the phrase "Life is not a matter of milestones, but of the moments that make it up" but we tend not to take it to heart. We choose to hurry, hurry, hurry and feel the need to go, go, go.
That is not what life is about. Life is about enjoying the minute by minute, day by days. We choose to be too busy for family gatherings or dinners, and instead choose to clean or sort through things. Often when we choose to be too busy, we hurt others. We don't realize that sometimes we just need to stop and "smell the roses."
Life can get busy and often throw us in a whirlwind, but we can choose to slow down and enjoy every bit of it (even the dirty diapers and sleepless nights.) Its all a choice. Its all up to us. No one can force us to be too busy or not enjoy the small moments. Yes I (full time job and mother of twins) realize that life can pass us by, but we allow it to. Stop. Listen. Relax. Enjoy.
When the babies were in the NICU, I had two choices, and I often explored both. I could ask "why?" and cry or I could thank God for two blessings, two babies that were healthy and just fine...just 7 weeks early. The other night I asked my dad what he thought when he first saw the babies wheeled by in their incubator being whisked to the NICU and he replied "I couldn't believe how small they were, but I counted their toes, fingers, ears and eyes and when I knew they were all their, I knew they were ok." Right then and there he chose to believe that his first biological grandchildren were going to be fine....
So, life gives us choices. I can cry from exhaustion and frustration when Parker screams about his braces in won't sleep unless I rock him, or I can choose to enjoy the moment because one day soon he won't want to be rocked. I can be stressed out about taking two babies everywhere I go and the change of lifestyle, or I can choose to thank God for the wonderful double blessings He has given me. Its all how you choose to look at it. Its all a choice. Life is a choice and how you choose affects not only others, but yourself and outlook on life. Slow down. Choose to be happy and to allow God to work in your life. Choose to smile instead of cry. Choose to rock your baby just a few minutes longer and choose to say "I love you" to someone and mean it. Life passes us by so quickly and days are not guaranteed. Choose to make each and every minute count.
We hear the phrase "Life is not a matter of milestones, but of the moments that make it up" but we tend not to take it to heart. We choose to hurry, hurry, hurry and feel the need to go, go, go.
That is not what life is about. Life is about enjoying the minute by minute, day by days. We choose to be too busy for family gatherings or dinners, and instead choose to clean or sort through things. Often when we choose to be too busy, we hurt others. We don't realize that sometimes we just need to stop and "smell the roses."
Life can get busy and often throw us in a whirlwind, but we can choose to slow down and enjoy every bit of it (even the dirty diapers and sleepless nights.) Its all a choice. Its all up to us. No one can force us to be too busy or not enjoy the small moments. Yes I (full time job and mother of twins) realize that life can pass us by, but we allow it to. Stop. Listen. Relax. Enjoy.
When the babies were in the NICU, I had two choices, and I often explored both. I could ask "why?" and cry or I could thank God for two blessings, two babies that were healthy and just fine...just 7 weeks early. The other night I asked my dad what he thought when he first saw the babies wheeled by in their incubator being whisked to the NICU and he replied "I couldn't believe how small they were, but I counted their toes, fingers, ears and eyes and when I knew they were all their, I knew they were ok." Right then and there he chose to believe that his first biological grandchildren were going to be fine....
So, life gives us choices. I can cry from exhaustion and frustration when Parker screams about his braces in won't sleep unless I rock him, or I can choose to enjoy the moment because one day soon he won't want to be rocked. I can be stressed out about taking two babies everywhere I go and the change of lifestyle, or I can choose to thank God for the wonderful double blessings He has given me. Its all how you choose to look at it. Its all a choice. Life is a choice and how you choose affects not only others, but yourself and outlook on life. Slow down. Choose to be happy and to allow God to work in your life. Choose to smile instead of cry. Choose to rock your baby just a few minutes longer and choose to say "I love you" to someone and mean it. Life passes us by so quickly and days are not guaranteed. Choose to make each and every minute count.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Busy...Blessings...Belief
It has been awhile since I have blogged, but life here at Hickory Hills is quite busy and breezy. Mom aka DeDe is currently sailing away in the Virgin Islands, football is still going strong and now basketball is in full affect as well as my new job! I will now be teaching 2nd grade at Foyil so Chris and I will both be back at the same school. Needless to say, it doesn't leave much time for blogging.
The babies are doing great. They love going to Pop's basketball scrimmages, hanging out with DeDe or going to the nursery at church. They however, do not like the nursery at the Rec Center, so that means mommy will have a belly a bit longer. Lol. Payge has graduated from rolling and army crawling to scooting and she will "crawl" one step and then fall down. Parker enjoys attempting to crawl...when his braces are off. We go back to the Dr on the 31st to see if he can just go strictly to nights with his braces. We are hoping so because he is such a different kiddo without those darn Dobbs braces on. We are making the great adventure of baby foods and have found out they do not like: peaches, green peas or bananas. We have been sneaking the peaches and bananas into their oatmeal in the mornings. I think they have currently picked on it because they are now sticking their noses up at it. Lol my sassy kiddos, guess I cannot deny them.
As we were driving home from one of dad's scrimmages yesterday afternoon, I looked in the back seat and I couldn't believe how blessed I am. I have two beautiful (they take after their daddy) healthy kiddos who are content 97% of the time, I have a husband who busts his tail at work and at home to take care of us, I have an awesome job surrounded by great people, a great support system of family and friends and a miraculous God who loves above all. Blessed. I used to say that I was lucky but I no longer feel that way...I feel blessed. Blessed beyond belief. How could I have done this, survived all this, with out my God? Without His unending love? There is no way. There is absolutely no way that I could have possilbly endured the past 6 and a half months with out the power of prayer, the support of loved ones and knowing that my Faith will help me through.
So even though we are busy busy busy here with the nuggets scooting and crawling everywhere, two full time jobs plus the endless amount of sports going on, I wouldn't change it for the world, because we are blessed beyond belief.
The babies are doing great. They love going to Pop's basketball scrimmages, hanging out with DeDe or going to the nursery at church. They however, do not like the nursery at the Rec Center, so that means mommy will have a belly a bit longer. Lol. Payge has graduated from rolling and army crawling to scooting and she will "crawl" one step and then fall down. Parker enjoys attempting to crawl...when his braces are off. We go back to the Dr on the 31st to see if he can just go strictly to nights with his braces. We are hoping so because he is such a different kiddo without those darn Dobbs braces on. We are making the great adventure of baby foods and have found out they do not like: peaches, green peas or bananas. We have been sneaking the peaches and bananas into their oatmeal in the mornings. I think they have currently picked on it because they are now sticking their noses up at it. Lol my sassy kiddos, guess I cannot deny them.
As we were driving home from one of dad's scrimmages yesterday afternoon, I looked in the back seat and I couldn't believe how blessed I am. I have two beautiful (they take after their daddy) healthy kiddos who are content 97% of the time, I have a husband who busts his tail at work and at home to take care of us, I have an awesome job surrounded by great people, a great support system of family and friends and a miraculous God who loves above all. Blessed. I used to say that I was lucky but I no longer feel that way...I feel blessed. Blessed beyond belief. How could I have done this, survived all this, with out my God? Without His unending love? There is no way. There is absolutely no way that I could have possilbly endured the past 6 and a half months with out the power of prayer, the support of loved ones and knowing that my Faith will help me through.
So even though we are busy busy busy here with the nuggets scooting and crawling everywhere, two full time jobs plus the endless amount of sports going on, I wouldn't change it for the world, because we are blessed beyond belief.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Tossing and Turning....
Gone are the nights of 8-10 hours of sleep-undisturbed, or the Saturday mornings of waking up at 10am, watching some College Football gameday and vegging out in your PJ's. Gone are the nighst of sponatneous dates, romantic unrushed dinners and wearing something that doesn't have spit up on it.....
Welcome to "Mommy hood." As I sit here, running on about 3.5 hours of sleep, about to start my new job, I can't help but smile. I can't help but laugh as I watch Parker grab the blanket away from Payge and shove it into his mouth-everything seems to make it there these days. I can't help but chuckle inside as Payge rolls all the way across the living room to steal a toy from her brother, or yank his pacifier out. These moments help me forget-for a tid bit- that Parker screamed for 3 hours straight last night-teething stinks!- or that Miss Payge refused to take a nap the past two days that I stayed home with her. Isn't life fun?!?
Last night, after Parker finally calmed down (because him and daddy made a palet and slept together), I couldn't help but let my mind wonder. So many questions, concerns, etc. come into my head and bounce around. When am I going to get that darn flu shot we all need to get? Should I take the babies to War Eagle? Why do people think it is necessary to come all the way across from somewhere to touch my baby? Or ask me if they are identical twins?? (HELLO?!?! One boy/One girl!! NO THEY ARE NOT IDENTICAL!!) Am I taking them out too much? How much sleep do they need? How late is too late for a nap? Man...these mommy questions and thoughts keep me up all night...tossing and turning.
No one writes a book about what to do if one twin is screaming and the other is sleeping....or what do you do if one baby is teething....or if both babies want to snuggle and you are home alone....or what if one baby dominates the other one and wont quit picking on the other one??? No one tells you these things, or prepares you. Instead....you get to toss and turn...all night long.
So self help books...or "what to expect books"...bite me. You are no longer wanted or needed, because apparently my babies are writing their own chapter and it is "Gang up on Mommy and overtake her."
So as I sit here, sleep deprived, but still with a smile on my face, I know that the tossing and turning will continue until the babies are, oh lets say 65? So, I will continue reading good books and FB at all hours of the night.
Welcome to "Mommy hood." As I sit here, running on about 3.5 hours of sleep, about to start my new job, I can't help but smile. I can't help but laugh as I watch Parker grab the blanket away from Payge and shove it into his mouth-everything seems to make it there these days. I can't help but chuckle inside as Payge rolls all the way across the living room to steal a toy from her brother, or yank his pacifier out. These moments help me forget-for a tid bit- that Parker screamed for 3 hours straight last night-teething stinks!- or that Miss Payge refused to take a nap the past two days that I stayed home with her. Isn't life fun?!?
Last night, after Parker finally calmed down (because him and daddy made a palet and slept together), I couldn't help but let my mind wonder. So many questions, concerns, etc. come into my head and bounce around. When am I going to get that darn flu shot we all need to get? Should I take the babies to War Eagle? Why do people think it is necessary to come all the way across from somewhere to touch my baby? Or ask me if they are identical twins?? (HELLO?!?! One boy/One girl!! NO THEY ARE NOT IDENTICAL!!) Am I taking them out too much? How much sleep do they need? How late is too late for a nap? Man...these mommy questions and thoughts keep me up all night...tossing and turning.
No one writes a book about what to do if one twin is screaming and the other is sleeping....or what do you do if one baby is teething....or if both babies want to snuggle and you are home alone....or what if one baby dominates the other one and wont quit picking on the other one??? No one tells you these things, or prepares you. Instead....you get to toss and turn...all night long.
So self help books...or "what to expect books"...bite me. You are no longer wanted or needed, because apparently my babies are writing their own chapter and it is "Gang up on Mommy and overtake her."
So as I sit here, sleep deprived, but still with a smile on my face, I know that the tossing and turning will continue until the babies are, oh lets say 65? So, I will continue reading good books and FB at all hours of the night.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
October First
The days of making out practice schedules, preparing pre season posters and speeches and setting up teams to scrimmage are long gone. October 1-the first legal day to practice school basketball. The day that for my entire life has been bigger than Christmas and more important than birthdays.
Well, this October first, we celebrated and rejoiced. This past Thursday we were at a softball game watching my brother coach when Payge, my sweet precious Payge, was hit in the head by a line drive foul ball. She was sitting in my mom's lap when Chris say the ball out of the corner of his eye and tried to stop it with a back hand. He blocked the ball but it then bounced off and hit Payge in the upper part of her head. Without Chris' attempt to slow down the ball.....well only God knows the damage that it could have done to my babygirl. We were rushed to St Johns ER in an ambulance and she was given a CT to see if and what the damagae was. Hours (and hours) later we were informed that she had a slight skull fracture and they were admitting us to Pediatric Intensive Care (PICU) where we had already spent 3 weeks of our lives.
After a night in PICU and then a night in Peds, we were told that Payge could go home and that we were lucky. I will go with the fact that we are blessed. Truly blessed. God, and Chris' state championship ring, saved my little girls life.
The babies celebrated their 6 month birthday today. A day that has approached rather too quickly. A day that was full of tears (from the setting and complete exhaustion) smiles and lots and lots of kisses and hugs. My two miracle Nuggets have been through so much in their short 6 months. We have had IV's, surgery, heart monitors, a trip to Florida for the passing of my Uncle, a move "back home" to Hickory Hills with Dede and Pop, an ambulance ride and oh so much more.
October first has come and gone. A day that my whole life used to revolve around. A day that I looked forward to and prepared for. I miss my girls. I miss decorating the locker room, timed miles once a week, setting up a scrimmage schedule and coaches clinic. But I wouldn't trade my life of rattles, breathing treatments, sweet potatoes and pre digested formula for the world right now.
So, October first, thank you for helping me realize that even though I miss it, there is more to life than airing up new basketball, sweeping the gym floor and pulling the practice jersey's out of storage. Thank you for opening up my eyes to "mommy hood" even thought I have ego issues at times about no longer being a "head coach" I know that my love for the game is deep in my heart and the passion I have for basketball will be passed on to the two that have made me realize that EVERY day matters and should be cherished, enjoyed and soaked up.
So, October first...you can keep your freshly waxed floors, your squeeky ball cage wheels and shoot aways-I will take my job as Head Mommy for now....but we will meet again one day....and I promise you that.
WC ladies-play hard and play smart and remember "do the little things right"
Well, this October first, we celebrated and rejoiced. This past Thursday we were at a softball game watching my brother coach when Payge, my sweet precious Payge, was hit in the head by a line drive foul ball. She was sitting in my mom's lap when Chris say the ball out of the corner of his eye and tried to stop it with a back hand. He blocked the ball but it then bounced off and hit Payge in the upper part of her head. Without Chris' attempt to slow down the ball.....well only God knows the damage that it could have done to my babygirl. We were rushed to St Johns ER in an ambulance and she was given a CT to see if and what the damagae was. Hours (and hours) later we were informed that she had a slight skull fracture and they were admitting us to Pediatric Intensive Care (PICU) where we had already spent 3 weeks of our lives.
After a night in PICU and then a night in Peds, we were told that Payge could go home and that we were lucky. I will go with the fact that we are blessed. Truly blessed. God, and Chris' state championship ring, saved my little girls life.
The babies celebrated their 6 month birthday today. A day that has approached rather too quickly. A day that was full of tears (from the setting and complete exhaustion) smiles and lots and lots of kisses and hugs. My two miracle Nuggets have been through so much in their short 6 months. We have had IV's, surgery, heart monitors, a trip to Florida for the passing of my Uncle, a move "back home" to Hickory Hills with Dede and Pop, an ambulance ride and oh so much more.
October first has come and gone. A day that my whole life used to revolve around. A day that I looked forward to and prepared for. I miss my girls. I miss decorating the locker room, timed miles once a week, setting up a scrimmage schedule and coaches clinic. But I wouldn't trade my life of rattles, breathing treatments, sweet potatoes and pre digested formula for the world right now.
So, October first, thank you for helping me realize that even though I miss it, there is more to life than airing up new basketball, sweeping the gym floor and pulling the practice jersey's out of storage. Thank you for opening up my eyes to "mommy hood" even thought I have ego issues at times about no longer being a "head coach" I know that my love for the game is deep in my heart and the passion I have for basketball will be passed on to the two that have made me realize that EVERY day matters and should be cherished, enjoyed and soaked up.
So, October first...you can keep your freshly waxed floors, your squeeky ball cage wheels and shoot aways-I will take my job as Head Mommy for now....but we will meet again one day....and I promise you that.
WC ladies-play hard and play smart and remember "do the little things right"
Sunday, September 25, 2011
My brother, My friend
24 years ago, God blessed me with an amazing little brother. At the time, I was not content with a little pesky brother, and wanted a puppy. I got one, but the puppy didn't make the crying red headed terror go away. I tried giving him away at Wal Mart...and when Mom told me that wasn't nice, I tried selling him for a penny.
Many times throughout the years, the red headed, big eyed, brother of mine caused me some pain and grief...like when we stuck my face to the couch while my parents were gone, or after I struck him out and he chased me with a red plastic bat and hit me in the head. But also, many times throughout the years, he has been there for me, to help me or bail me out of a bind, like when I needed some fast cash to tow my car or when he didn't agree with someone I was dating.
No longer are the days that we argue or compete (no we still occassionally tatle on each other but its sibling love).No longer are the days that I look at him and cringe when he is crying, instead we lend each other a shoulder, or when him and mom may disagree, I try to play a mentor to him in the situation instead of running to mom and telling what he said or did.
As I watch my brother coach softball, work on lesson plans and play with the babies, I realize that God blessed me with a great brother and an amazing friend. God knew we would have each others temper, love for sports and competition, but God also knew we needed each other. That is why DJ never sold at Wal Mart, or why the injuries he sustained from me pushing him out of a chair, or putting him in the dryer were never intense or severe, because God knew that my ornery, red headed, spit fire of a little brother would someday become one of my best friends. He knew that I would need him in life, especially when I brought Payge home and Chris was still in Fairfax, DJ took the midnight to3am shift and rocked Peanut for me so I could sleep. So I am thankful and grateful for a little brother that is not so little any more, but has now grown into a charming, smart, handsome and soft hearted young man who I am proud to call my "little brother".
I love you Uncle DJ
Many times throughout the years, the red headed, big eyed, brother of mine caused me some pain and grief...like when we stuck my face to the couch while my parents were gone, or after I struck him out and he chased me with a red plastic bat and hit me in the head. But also, many times throughout the years, he has been there for me, to help me or bail me out of a bind, like when I needed some fast cash to tow my car or when he didn't agree with someone I was dating.
No longer are the days that we argue or compete (no we still occassionally tatle on each other but its sibling love).No longer are the days that I look at him and cringe when he is crying, instead we lend each other a shoulder, or when him and mom may disagree, I try to play a mentor to him in the situation instead of running to mom and telling what he said or did.
As I watch my brother coach softball, work on lesson plans and play with the babies, I realize that God blessed me with a great brother and an amazing friend. God knew we would have each others temper, love for sports and competition, but God also knew we needed each other. That is why DJ never sold at Wal Mart, or why the injuries he sustained from me pushing him out of a chair, or putting him in the dryer were never intense or severe, because God knew that my ornery, red headed, spit fire of a little brother would someday become one of my best friends. He knew that I would need him in life, especially when I brought Payge home and Chris was still in Fairfax, DJ took the midnight to3am shift and rocked Peanut for me so I could sleep. So I am thankful and grateful for a little brother that is not so little any more, but has now grown into a charming, smart, handsome and soft hearted young man who I am proud to call my "little brother".
I love you Uncle DJ
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